July 23, 2014.  Bishop Jesse Mercado was slated to pay a Pastoral Visit to the Ascension of Our Lord Parish at 5pm.  He was to say mass at one of the developing areas and then proceed to the parish for a fellowship and meeting with the parish leaders.  The parish leaders and Fr. Joseph Landero have been preparing for the visit for three weeks. I was asked to emcee the meeting and to help our parish secretary with the PowerPoint Presentation of parish plans during the meeting.

Truth to tell, I was hesitant about even showing up, not knowing how I would be able to handle the visit.  The first time I encountered a Pastoral Visit was in 2008, when I was president of the Parish Pastoral Council with Fr. Didoy Molina as our parish priest. Together with the other leaders, we prepared documentation of our parish activities, achievements, financial report, and plans which we presented in a Parish Covenant Book to the Bishop.  Full of fervor to serve the church, we were so happy when the Bishop congratulated us, saying The Ascension of Our Lord Parish may be a small one but it was an excellent example of a God-filled ecclesial community.

The last pastoral visit was in 2010.  By then, I had finished my term as president of the PPC and was now just a member of the Parish Planning Board.  But still, the fervor was there and we were again congratulated roundly.

This visit though was different.  This was the first time the Bishop was coming to visit after the heated controversy that took the Diocese of Paranaque by storm in 2012, spurring concerned parish leaders and parishioners to question the way the diocese was being managed on issues of governance, transparency and accountability.  The controversy landed in national news and was covered in a chapter in the book, Altar of Secrets.  The Lay Initiative for Transparency and Accountability (LAITY) was established, as the laity pushed for reform, communicating with church leaders, even as far the Vatican.

For being one of those who voiced out our concerns, I was criticized roundly and made a target during parish sermons. The other parish leaders were also treated the same way, eased out of their parish pastoral councils, and some even were not renewed as lectors and ministers of the Holy Eucharist. The priests who had stood up against the bishop were removed from their positions, and assigned to hardship posts.

The controversy cut the community deeply as parishioners all over the diocese took sides.  My daughter withdrew from being a lector, and my son from being an altar server.  Niccolo could not bear hearing his mother lambasted in church.  Mike stopped going to church, and ordered me to stop tithing until we were sure that the monies collected went to their intended beneficiaries.  Pretty soon, I was all alone going to mass, still serving as a lector but hurting nevertheless.  I reminded myself that it was God I was serving and not the church leadership.  And then Mike took ill, and I withdrew from attending LAITY meetings to focus on taking care of him.  I agonized over what had befallen our family for having stood up on my principles.  Did God take Mike away because of this?

On Pentecost Day during mass, Fr. JoLan announced that the bishop had been cleared by the Nuncio of all wrongdoing in a report.  I asked my circle of priest friends if they had seen the report.  None had. I wanted to ask for a copy of that report, as the LAITY as well as concerned priests had met with the Nuncio several times regarding the situation, asking for an answer to our questions.  Such a report would put the matter finally to rest, I thought and would be a first step towards healing the rift.

The day before the pastoral visit, I called Chris, our parish secretary to ask for a copy of the Parish Covenant Book on which the presentation was to be based.  Chris said he was still working on it, but would email it first thing in the morning.  I woke up at 5am that day, ready to work on the prezo, but it had not come in.  With back to back meetings all day, it was not until the afternoon that I realized that I still had not received the promised email.  So, at 5pm on that rainy afternoon, I went to the parish to work on it, but not before first passing by the new adoration chapel.  As I knelt in the still chapel, I prayed for guidance, discernment, patience, forgiveness and understanding.  Let Your Will be done, Oh Lord, I prayed.

At the bahay pari, I learned that Chris was still at work and had not finished putting together the Parish Covenant Book.  I asked him to email what he had finished so far.  Instead, I got the individual reports of the various commissions which were in different formats.  As I rushed to compile these into a coherent presentation, I heard the Bishop and the priests arrive.  I stood up and greeted the Bishop, who extended his condolences on Mike’s passing.  I was surprised that he had known.  Perhaps Fr. JoLan had told him.

The dinner and the meeting went smoothly.  I was itching to grill the Bishop regarding the controversy and the Nuncio report that Fr. JoLan had talked about, but did not want to embarrass the council and Fr. JoLan, and so I kept quiet. Doing so would only make matters worse, I thought. No questions were asked during the open forum.  It was only later I found out that they had been told not to ask questions.  Oh, well!

As we left the room, I went up to the Bishop and asked him why he still had not given Fr. Didoy a parish.  After all, the Bishop had told me that he would do this a year ago.  The Bishop said it was because Fr. Didoy would not see him. What if I arranged the meeting, I asked him.  Would you talk to him as Christ did his disciples?  He gave me his mobile number and said yes.

Will need to storm the heavens with prayers to make this work.