Friendship, Life, Tourism, Training, Travel, Work

Making a Difference in MICE Cebu

August 25, 2014 administrator

August 23 and 24. Frenzied, fun and fulfilling is how I would characterize the past two days I’ve spent in the company of Philippine M.I.C.E. Academy colleagues Tinette Capistrano of Primetrade Asia, Inc., Marisa Nallana of PETCO, Jing Lagandaoan of Globallink MP, Anton Magpantay of Creatif Foire PRO, Joel Pascual of PEP Group and Sonia Sayaman of ATN. Teaching has always been a passion of mine, and so three years ago, I joined industry friends in setting up the Philippine Meetings, Incentive, Travel, Conventions, Exhibitions/Events (M.I.C.E.) Academy.

Envisioned to be the training arm of the Philippine Association of Convention/Exhibition Organizers and Suppliers (PACEOS), the Academy is meant to answer the need for continuing education to upgrade the quality, competence, and excellence of M.I.C.E. professionals and practitioners in their delivery of tourism and trade services and to make them globally competitive. Who best to provide industry practitioners better knowledge, updated techniques, and latest trends in M.I.C.E. than those in the trenches, like us? The problem is getting all these super busy individuals to pry themselves away from their events to actually get to teach.

And so it was almost a miracle that everyone’s schedule converged for last weekend’s Event Management 101 Workshop for the Cebu Association of Tour Operators (CATO). Under the able leadership of its president Marget Villarica who sits with me on the Tourism Promotions Board, and its VP and project lead Alice Queblatin, CATO had applied for a training grant from the Asian Development Bank (ADB) and the Canadian International Development Agency (CIDA).

The workshop was designed to help CATO members learn how to plan, organize, promote, manage and evaluate conferences, exhibitions and events; identify and form strategic partnerships with customers, suppliers, sponsors and other events organizers; know current global trends and marketing approaches in the M.I.C.E. industry; learn how to prepare bid proposals for international conferences and meetings; and develop competitive and winning incentive travel packages.

CATO opened up the workshop to their partners in the industry, and so we had 80 participants, consisting of tour operators, hotel and resort sales executives, a sprinkling of MICE professors and students, tourism promotion officers, tour guides and event organizers. I was surprised to see amongst the participants the famous Patricio Primor, Jr., better known as Junjet. The artistic force behind most of Cebu’s major event productions, Junjet I felt strongly should actually be one of the trainers. Representatives from the Department of Tourism and ADB sat in to evaluate the workshop.

Despite their hectic schedules, the trainers readily agreed to spend their precious weekend and rest time to travel to Cebu for the workshop. All seasoned industry experts, the trainers shared their knowledge and best practices, drawing on their vast experience in organizing MICE events. A quick survey showed we had at least 150 years of consolidated MICE experience represented in the room. Joining the Academy trainers were Raquel Tria of the Tourism Promotions Board, Clang Garcia of Jeepney Tours, and Albert Lafuente of Shangri-La’s Mactan Hotel and Resort. And because we were all busy with our own events and companies, we all had a big laugh when we realized that we had crammed preparing the slides the night before.

Most of the trainers traveled to Cebu Friday. Unfortunately, I couldn’t join them because TeamAsia was organizing Globe’s Digital Lifestyle Expo at the SM Megamall Fashion Hall Friday night. While waiting for the event to begin, I hurried over to Forever 21 to get a white t-shirt for the second day of the workshop. The Academy had decided to liven up the workshop by asking the participants to dress up according to the day’s theme. Day One’s theme was beach wear, while Day Two was all white shirts which we would ask the participants to color as an icebreaker and networking activity.

10600633_10203559628005593_7090710783448159203_n — The stragglers arrive at the Cebu airport to a VIP welcome.

Going home late Friday night, I agonized over what beach wear to don, given that I was going to teach. I can’t really wear a swimsuit on stage, right? With very little time to plan my wardrobe, I quickly threw a few things in my bag, hoped for the best, and started working on my slides for the next day. I noticed Joel’s post on FB wearing the welcome lei he got at the airport. I was jealous, but happy to get my own lei when I arrived at the airport Saturday morning with Raquel and Anton. Cheap thrills to be treated like a VIP at the airport!

10540833_10203560586509555_267010336476693509_n — Presentation 101: Surprise your audience.

Operations Management was my assigned topic for Day One. How to keep audience interest in the early afternoon with such a boring, yet important and incredibly detailed brass tacks topic? Inspiration hit me just as I took the stage. I decided to remove my huge overshirt to reveal a modest tank top and sarong underneath. Presentation 101 technique: surprise your audience with a mini strip tease. Now that worked like magic! And quick-witted Sonia snapped up some photos too.

By the end of the day, we were all tired from serious teaching. With a few minutes to spare, we took out mobile phone cams and decided to have our photos taken in fun. A serious photographer (who had an all access pass at the recent Bench underwear show and lots of stories to tell), Joel gave us some tips on how to emphasize our curves for photo shoots. I am too embarrassed to include my shots here, and will just keep them for my future grandchildren to know that their lola was once a hottie (borrowing Coke’s term).

10606146_10203561437330825_8120349037533074817_n — Dinner at Lemon Grass

After hamming it up for the cameras, we hurried over to the Redemptorist Church to attend the anticipated mass, and then went to Ayala Mall to buy white t-shirts, coloring pens, stickers and sparkles for the next day’s fellowship activity. Dinner was at Lemon Grass, which sadly did not have the strong Thai flavors I was looking forward to. But the camaraderie more than made up for the food. Still wired up, we ended up at the Marco Polo Lobby Lounge for a nightcap, which was accompanied by a lot of ribbing and teasing about dating and relationships at our age. After all, we were all single people sans Jing who had to fly back to Manila, and some of us, beginning anew to relearn skills long lost.

The second day of the workshop had the participants preparing their pitches for their assigned events, and dreaming up the most creative incentive packages that would put Cebu in the limelight and attract tourists and investments. In between learning sessions, we all had fun writing messages and drawing on each other’s white shirts, forging friendships in the process.

From fiestas to conferences to sports events and concerts, the participants gamely defended their proposals for events and incentive packages to the panel of discriminating judges. Several of the presentations were gems, but one group shone brightly. No surprise that it was Junjet’s group that bagged the best presentation for both the event and incentive package. Come to think of it, the fact that Junjet stayed for the entire two days and participated wholeheartedly and actively was the best measure for the success of the workshop.

The participants obviously enjoyed the learning opportunity tremendously, with many coming up to us with words of appreciation and the inevitable request for a photo souvenir. It was truly a rewarding experience not just for the participants, but more for us trainers. I really believe that the more you share, the more you get in return. Circle of life.

During the awarding of certificates, I learned from Tinette that we had to wear the CATO shirt we were given earlier for the group photo, so I rushed back to the room to put it on. Arriving back at the venue, I heard everyone laughing only to realize that they had been looking for me to say a few final words to close the workshop, and bubbly Alice had said that Monette was probably still undressing. Will I ever live down my new reputation?

At the airport, we were told that we could not hand carry the Cebu chorizos we were given, so Marisa and Anton put their loot into my check-in luggage. I was glad for Anton’s company on the Tiger Air plane ride back to Manila. Highly claustrophobic, I worried if I could get through the hour long flight without screaming. Anton offered to exchange places so that I could have the window seat. We started talking about work, clients, family and life, and soon I had forgotten about the cramped space. Anton is an amazing person, kind to a fault, highly accomplished and driven yet very low-key. Another hero from this industry to look up to, and one I am glad to call a friend.

It was funny, but Anton’s first question was, “How long were you a nun?” I was taken aback only to realize that Anton didn’t know me as long as the others did and only picked up from the ribbing that had taken place in the past two days. The new Monette had emerged, they teased. Who once was a formal, reserved individual (aka madre) was now a daring individual, doing things they never would have imagined me to do. I guess my shirt said it all.

Life, Love, music, Women

Feeling Young Again, Fleetingly

August 23, 2014 administrator

August 19, 2014. For people who’ve been through tough times with cancer, who have gone through hope and despair while watching helpless as their loved ones wasted away, Project Pink’s fundraiser last night was a breath of fresh air. A brainchild of cancer survivors who’ve become close friends, Project Pink is a support group for people faced with the dreaded C.

So when weeks ago Angie Laborte sold us tickets to Stage Zero, a concert for a cause featuring The 70s Superband at Hard Rock Cafe, our group of friends immediately said yes. It was a date, we all agreed.

When I called Mongsie yesterday to see if we could go together, Mongsie was ambivalent about going. She urged me to go anyway saying Chloe would be there. Apparently, Miri and Marie were not going either. Bea said she was too busy and tired. So, I went alone but not after checking if another friend Pam could join me. Luckily, Pam agreed and I was glad for her company. I didn’t want to go alone to Hard Rock.

To my surprise, Mongsie and Chloe were already there, drinking margaritas. After a quick update on what everyone was up to and lots of sound advice on dating from my friends, we settled in to watch the band perform.

Soon, Pam and then Bea, who had changed her mind because of Pam’s prompting, arrived. Another surprise! The young women went off to the other room to talk. We crowded ourselves into a little table at the back of the packed room.

What a performance it was! Pinoy OPM from when we were young.
Guests sang along, we danced, moving to the beat of music we had experienced life’s happy and sad moments with, forgetting heartaches and pains, shedding fears and sorrows, peeling off the years, and for a fleeting hour, feeling young and carefree and on top of the world once more.

They say that laughter is the best medicine, but music, I dare say, is the balm that soothes the soul. It is the trigger that can bring back a flood of memories come a-calling. It can magically transport you back in time to wherever you most desire to be. And if by any lucky chance you happen to be listening to music with someone you had shared life’s special moments with, you get to relive that previous moment one more time. And fall in love all over again. With a tinge of envy, I smiled as I saw old couples holding hands that night. I sent a silent prayer up to Mike.

On the short drive back home, Bea and I sang along to her collection of old songs. Each one quietly thinking of loved ones gained and lost to the dreaded C. Of hellos and goodbyes. Of love invited in, and then shut out. Dreaming of how life’s next chapter will unfold. As for me, the song we sang lightheartedly felt strangely ominous.

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered… am I.

Beginnings, Death, Faith, Friendship, God, Goodbyes, Life, Love, Resilience

Clearing out, moving on

August 17, 2014 administrator 2 Comments

This morning when I woke up, I decided to finally clear our walk in closet of all of Mike’s clothes. I should have given them away long before, but truth to tell, I could not bear to part with them. Seeing his suits hanging in our closet somehow comforted me.

Someone had told me that it was good to get rid of things that remind you of someone you had loved and lost, and that this was the first step for moving on. On Facebook, I saw a post that said, “You can’t reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday’s junk.” And yet another post said, “Think positive and positive things will happen.”

It seems the world was telling me it was time to let go. Mike was never coming back in this lifetime. Death had claimed him, and he was back with our Creator.

So with a heart full of hope that life indeed would get better, I did exactly that. Cleared everything out, and packed them in two suitcases. Oh, I cried a river while I was doing it, remembering good times with Mike, cherishing our love, but when I finally shut the suitcases, I felt ready to begin life anew.

What lies ahead, I wonder?

Corporate Social Responsibility, Food, Friendship, Uncategorized, Women, Work

LCF Ladies at the Retreat

August 17, 2014 administrator 3 Comments

It all started July 30 when I received a call from Techu asking if I would be willing to invite the League of Corporate Foundations (LCF) ladies to the Hamlin Retreat in Alfonso on August 16. I immediately agreed. We had just finished celebrating the Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR) month, and the thought of having a break from work to relax, catch up with each other, and chat the day away seemed too good to pass up.

It was the brainchild of my LCF mentor, the lovely Lydia Sarmiento Enrile, who wanted to gather the ladies for a leisurely day of bonding. Soon the emails were flying back and forth as plans hatched, the menu firmed up, transportation issues settled, and more friends confirmed. Maurice Ligot of Ang Hortaleza Foundation promised to bring along her therapists for some serious pampering with their signature foot massage. Raffle queen Elaine Mapa galvanized into action. Excitement was at an all-time high. The list of confirmed guests grew longer: Vicky Garchitorena, Irene Labitad, Techu Tumbali, Cecile Alcantara, Camile Buenaventura, Malu Erni, Esther Santos, Ching Jorge, Tess Villacorta, Neury Chan, My Almogino-Calara, Nicole Tirona, Rory Tolentino, Joyce Talag, Linda Atayde.

What I didn’t figure out was how busy my entire week leading up to the Saturday ladies date would be, with back-to-back meetings late into the night. When would I ever find the time to shop, cook, and make all the preparations I wondered as Friday afternoon deepened into the evening? It was a relief to finally arrive at Alfonso, and to feel its peace settle in my soul. Although we’ve had the farm for almost eight years, this was the first time I would ever sleep there alone. It was blissful, and I slept like a babe, secure that Mike was watching over me, keeping me safe.

Early the next morning, I walked around the farm. It still looked sad from being ravaged by the storm, but the birds were chirping, the cicadas were humming, and the sun was peeking out, though the sky still seemed downcast. Internet connection was spotty, and has been since Glenda unleashed her fury on Alfonso, so I went looking for signal and finally found a faint one near the gate. I was startled when loud band music began playing outside our gate. And that’s when I found out that it was the town’s fiesta. I asked Jeovanie to set up the tables out back, but he discouraged me saying it always rained on fiesta days. Better to be safe and have the tables in the veranda.

Without Internet, I couldn’t make Jango work. While searching for our music CDs, I came upon one that was still unopened, Pure Country. Mike must have bought it. Putting it on, I was soon dancing to country music.

And then the ladies started arriving. Unfortunately some couldn’t make it and we missed their company. Laughing like little girls, we hugged and hugged each other. With everyone speaking, the decimal level quickly shot up. Pretty soon, we were partaking of the sumptuous lunch and gabbing our hearts away, taking turns at foot massages at the gazebo.

The afternoon passed quickly, and the ladies said good-bye but not before taking souvenir photos at the farm. I could not let them go without having the diwata shot, and everyone gamely picked a tree and posed.

Lydia captured how we all felt in her email last night, “How wonderful it was to discover that we have not changed all these years… that we are still the same LCF ladies “na mababa ang kaligayahan… that we still shriek at winning the raffle whether it is a bag of potato chips or a P500 gift certificate from SM care of Linda Atayde who had to fly to Cebu, or a heavy bag of condiments from Splash care of Maurice. Our afternoon was truly a fun-filled day thanks to all your contributions of food and sinful desserts. But most precious was sitting together, sharing stories once more, remembering friends in prayer and recounting past LCF fun days. Elaine Mapa continues to be our raffle queen. Most of all thank you, Monette for sharing your restful home with us, preparing the laing, fish and grilled vegetables, Malu for the adobo, Neury for the chicken a la king, lastly for the Cecille who saved the day for us by driving all the way to Alfonso. I am sure I missed someone or something, I only know that we are all hopeless romantics listening and vicariously sharing Vicky’s love story. Irene Labitad cannot show up next time without a new found love in her life. Thank you all ladies for making time to renew friendships, laugh at our silly jokes and continue to be women who serve but also know how to enjoy the simple pleasures of life. It is more fun with LCF friends. See you all in December!”

Truly, it was a day of fun and laughter well spent in the company of friends. I can’t wait till the next reunion!

Architecture, Tourism, Work

Today’s Hard Hat, Sneak Peek Experience

August 13, 2014 administrator 1 Comment

My interest was piqued by Marriott’s invitation to join today’s hard hat tour of their Grand Ballroom. Reported to be the largest pillar-less ballroom in the Philippines, this was going to be a most sought after venue, and I was excited to see it.

According to Bruce Winton, general manager of Marriot Hotel Manila, the Grand Ballroom would fit 2,500 people seated for a banquet or 4,500 guests for a performance or concert. With 20 meeting rooms and state of the art equipment, it would be perfect for meetings, incentives, conferences and exhibitions/special events (M.I.C.E.) events. I was surprised to learn that several weddings have already been booked there, well in advance of its slated March 15, 2015 opening.

Together with industry stalwarts from the travel and tours industry (Felise of T.R.I.P.S. Travel, Kristine of Shroff and Joanna of Rajah Tours) and accompanied by Arangkada Philippines’ John Forbes, we donned hard hats and masks to enter the site where construction was in full swing. Dust swirled about us and sparks flew from soldering equipment as we carefully navigated the site, avoiding metallic sheets being carried and gingerly stepping over heavy wires on the floor. Everywhere we went, work hummed as busy-bee construction crew raced to meet the deadline.

Amazed at the massive high-ceiling ballroom on the second floor, we noted six sky boxes on the fourth floor overlooking the ballroom. Equipped with their own private toilets, these sky boxes could each fit 12 guests. Imagine having your own private party with special guests enjoying a concert from way up there.

Lights would be retractable, according to JP Gutierrez, senior sales manager for MICE at Marriott Hotel Manila, who kindly toured us around. Catwalks marked the divisions where the ballroom could be divided into four smaller 700 sqm ballrooms. My imagination was in full swing thinking of all the events that could take place there, from international conferences and exhibitions to concerts, and social gatherings. Finally, Manila would have a fitting venue for large scale employee engagement events!

Outside the ballroom, a large hallway ran the length of the structure… a massive pre-function area for exhibits, cocktails, pocket events, and the like. Looking through the floor length glass windows, you could see Terminal 3 of the Ninoy Aquino International Airport.

On either end were two smaller functions rooms that could accommodate up to 200 guests, perfect for weddings and social events. East and West, they were called. Parking would be a breeze with three parking levels available. On the ground floor, three restaurants would cater to the needs of exhibitors and organizers. Marriott Hotel Manila however, would be the sole caterer for dining requirements in the function rooms, but with the delicious repast we just had, that seemed just right.

Dusty and hot from our hard hat experience, we went back to Marriot Hotel Manila, to be pampered with cold towels and cold refreshing water. Now, if only my fairy godmother could wave her wand and fast track the opening to February, John and I would be grinning like Cheshire cats.

Here’s a YouTube video from the Marriott Manila channel for a “Grand Sneak Peek” on things to come http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bTJHva_mdI.

Pretty nifty, right?

Uncategorized

A Christmas Card from 2012: The Year of the Dragon.

August 9, 2014 administrator

Browsing through my various musings, I came across a Christmas Card from 2012 that I had written. It was the Year of the Dragon. Unforgettable.

TeamAsia turned 20. What started literally in a garage in San Lorenzo has blossomed into an amazing award-winning strategic marketing communications firm that develops place, corporate, and personal brand strategies, creative concepts and marketing communications programs for its clients. It specializes in non-traditional communication channels, including the Web 2.0 (blog, Podcast and social network marketing, online brand advertising and website development, search engine marketing), contact center services, direct marketing, public relations, events, and innovative experiential and direct marketing communications collateral.

With 70 awesome talented and hard-working team members, TeamAsia has overcome enormous challenges, riding the crest of technology, bowing with the winds of change, seizing opportunities, while keeping true to the values of integrity, innovation, quality, excellence, and professionalism. Through all two decades, it’s been a Mike and Monette-led tandem.

Now that we’ve grown bigger, we’re delighted that our dedicated and seasoned executive team has stepped up to lead our initiatives. We’re so very proud of them, and blessed that they have chosen to grow with us as a family. They have allowed me to take on additional responsibilities as president of PACEOS, trustee of the League of Corporate Foundations, and private-sector director of the country’s Tourism Promotions Board.

And yes, the new guard is getting ready to lead TeamAsia’s third decade. Bea is finishing her masters in Integrated Marketing Communication at Boston’s Emerson College with a straight 4.0 average and will be back for good in a few months. Brimming with ideas, with a fresh, global outlook, Bea is excited to make things rock at TeamAsia. Well-loved by her circle of international friends, Bea has blossomed into a mature young woman, confident of her abilities.

Our adventurous Cara bonita is making things rock at Shangri-La Boracay’s chi-chi Rima. Trained under Chef Luca, Cara is ready to take on new challenges whipping exquisite dishes for discerning guests, and leading the kitchen staff to greater heights. Lithe and bronzed, our little thin chef has taken on dragon boating with a vengeance, and is enjoying what she loves best: cooking and beaches.

Niccolo is finishing up high school at Zobel, and getting ready for college life. This year, our sports enthusiast has mastered the art of mountain biking and duathlons, winning races, and making tons of friends and fans. I still can’t get over having girls’ heads swivel when he walks by. He has discovered the wonderful world of books, devouring several best sellers, and learned the joys (and sorrows) of driving.

October 10 was when the world came tumbling down for a brief moment. Mike, my beloved, my soul mate, my partner, was taken gravely ill, and we learned that the dreadful C has invaded our lives, unwelcome, unbidden. It was a test. A test of faith and resilience.

Prayer is the bridge between panic and peace. True story. I am grateful to my wonderful friends who are praying for us. When Bea brought home yellow arm bands of Hope, Faith, Strength and Survivor, it was interesting that both Mike and I chose Faith to wear like a shield.

We realize all the more how precious the gift of life and love is. We are so very grateful to our Lord for all the many blessings He has showered us: a wonderful company, real friends, and a family so full of love, strength and faith. We’re taking on this new challenge with hearts full of hope, armed with fervent prayers of family and friends. We choose to believe in God’s almighty grace.

So as the world gets ready to welcome 2013, we wish you all long, happy, healthy, prosperous and wonderfully meaningful lives.

Fast forward to today, August 9, 2014. Life has a way of turning on its head. Mike is home with the Lord, achingly missed by all of us.

Niccolo is in his second year of college, a strapping young man, looking more and more like his father each day.

After taking an internship in Palermo, Sicily, Cara is sous chef at Asya Premier Resorts, still in the Boracay that she loves, and giving in to wanderlust.

After bagging the President’s Award at Emerson College, Bea is back home running TeamAsia as our Managing Director, injecting her own brand of sunshine and sparkles, and doing a marvelous job leading our team of amazing people that create innovative ideas and deliver next-level experiences for brands.

As for me, I’ve taken on writing to ease the pain of losing my beloved Mike, and begin life anew, slowly, slowly, one day at a time.

Bullying, Childhood, Confidence

Of Bullies and Demons

August 8, 2014 administrator 4 Comments

Our son was bullied in La Salle Zobel School. One day, when he was in Grade 3, I made him stay at home because he was feverish. When I took off his shirt to give him a sponge bath, I was horrified to see big black bruises all over his torso. He refused to tell me or my husband what happened or who did it to him, so we went to the principal and complained. The perpetrators were “punished” with a C grade in conduct.

Several more incidents like these happened over the years. Each time, our son would hide it from us, afraid of what we, his parents, would do, and of the teasing that would follow from his classmates. He was smaller than his classmates, a quiet intelligent boy, preferring to play games on his computer rather than join the more athletic, physical games like other children his age.

It was thus a great relief for us when he finally defended himself from another bully on the last day of class just before a holiday. Despite several warnings to stop harassing him, the boy pushed him against the wall and was about to hit him, so our son hit him first. Just once, and the boy fell and cried. The teacher witnessed what had happened. Nevertheless, our son got a C in conduct (school rules say no fighting), while the other boy was put on probation. The boy’s last name: Elorde. Go figure.

Our family was elated! We celebrated our son’s victory. Finally, our son could stand up for himself. Never mind the C. Now, that he is almost six foot tall, I doubt if anyone would try to bully him.

Looking back, I’ve had my own fill of bullying. One occasion that stands out clearly was in first year high school. One day after lunch break, I was embarrassed to find my chair covered with eggs. Why, there must have been at least two dozen of them. Crying, I gave them to my teacher. To this day, I do not know who was behind this or why this was done to me, although I half suspect it was because I had refused to cheat during exams. But I carried the hurt for a very long time.

Later in life, I realized that I had allowed my ex-in laws to bully me. It became so bad that I, an otherwise accomplished business executive respected by my peers, would stutter in their presence. I was made to feel inferior and unwanted, below their social class. My sisters-in-law would go together shopping and brag about their exploits or finds, and I would never be invited. At clan parties, they would all sit together, excluding me, forcing me to find my place with other “out-laws.” So many instances I suffered, too painful to write down. What made it worse was not having my then husband’s support and understanding, and apparently, love. But that’s a limbo I was able to escape, now long behind me.

And just like my son, I never told anyone what painful times I was going through then. Was it fear that no one would believe me, or a feeling of shame that I actually deserved the treatment? Was I so lacking in self-esteem that I actually accepted the notion that I was not good enough for them? I don’t really know, except that I am so blessed that Mike, my knight in shining armor, came into my life, rescued me from this morass, reminded me of my self-worth, and restored my self-confidence. Secure in his love for me, I was happy.

Who becomes a bully? And who a victim? Is it something we are pre-disposed to? Is it the self-image we develop from childhood? Do we unknowingly accept what angry people say about us, instead of letting hurtful words slide off our backs like water to a duck? I think it really is a combination of the many experiences we’ve had from childhood to adulthood. In my case, I think it was losing my dad when I was but ten, feeling lost and realizing that I had no one to defend me.

If you’ve ever been a victim of bullying, you need to shake off your feeling of hopelessness. Remember that you are a child of God, precious to Him. You are not the problem. Document the bullying. Talk about it with other people. Expose the bully.

The funny yet sad thing is, I believe that all the bullies I’ve met are actually quite unhappy and insecure themselves. They display aggressive, cruel behavior towards people they think are vulnerable, to feel a sense of power and to cover up for their own insecurities or worries. Just like that boy who tried to hit my son. Turns out he was having problems at home, and needed an outlet for it. Unfortunately for him, he picked on my son that day.

So next time you’re faced with a bully, think, what monstrous problems must beset them that they have to resort to bullying. And instead of letting it affect you, pity them and let the water slide off your back.

Family, Food, God, Resilience

Alfonso after the Storm

August 3, 2014 administrator

August 3, 2014. Home at last in Alfonso! Everyone’s schedules finally converged and our family drove down to The Retreat for the weekend. We had not visited Alfonso since Glenda happened, and I feared the worst at what I would find.

We arrived at dark last night, with the rains pouring, after a brief late afternoon stop at Bag of Beans. Not having had lunch, Niccolo and I were both hungry but it took some girl convincing for Niccolo to try out a new place. His heart was set on pizza but Dada had just come from Rome and didn’t want any. I was pleasantly surprised at how pretty Bag of Beans has transformed from the rustic place Mike and I would visit years ago. Their porkchop tastes just as delicious and smoky as I remember it to be, and the raisin bread I bought was still warm from the oven.

We stayed indoors last night watching a love story on DVD, against Niccolo’s protests, but then it was one against three so we won that round. Dear John, it was. Not a weeper, thank goodness! Signal was spotty, weaving in and out, so I finally gave up trying to connect to the outside world. The night was cold and the wind whipped as I stepped out to the lanai. Alfonso nights are always magical. Peace settled into my soul, and I whispered goodnight to Mike’s spirit. I turned off the garden lights and locked downstairs. It felt good to be back home, in bed and listening to the pitter patter of the rain outside.

Early this morning, I set out with our caretaker Jeovanie to check out Glenda’s damage to the farm. The landscape was different. I could see all the way to the other embankment, which used to hide behind our lush foliage before. Bereft of their crowning glory, the trees seemed much thinner and more fragile, just like Bugsy is after taking a bath. Capiz lights that adorned the trees were battered; some had lost their shells. Fallen santol, rambutan and coconuts littered the ground, though I spied some kalamansi and dayap clinging on. It will take a while before we can enjoy the fruits of the farm again.

Trunks cut in half by the lashing of the wind stood sadly by. Trees leaned precariously on their sides, as if bowing down to the powers that be, unable to get back on their feet. It seemed that the biggest trees were the ones that could not withstand the onslaught of the storm and were uprooted completely: Five mangoes, one guyong guyong, one langka, one antipolo, several bamboos, and about a dozen and a half mahogany trees. The boys had tried to clear as much as they could but I still had to clamber over fallen logs to get around, and balance on the slippery moss-covered stones. Surprisingly, none of the 14 Stations of the Cross trees were damaged. Mike had taken care of them.

Jeovanie’s roof had flown off, but was now back in place. He tells me that most of our neighbors had lost their roofs, if not their entire houses. Why even the St. Paul nuns next door were not spared. Luckily, our house, outside kitchen and cabanas were not damaged, although Jeovanie said that at the height of the storm, he feared that the large picture windows would cave in with the pummeling of the wind, and that he and his wife Bleng were able to save the large glass top of our dinner table before the wind carried it off.

Despite the storm, however, the ground was lush with green, and new shoots were springing up. Rain, our dog, was running around, chickens were scratching for food while the roosters puffed up their chests to crow, birds chirped and flew from tree to tree. Everything smelled fresh and clean, as if God had given the world a bath to start the day right. And as I passed, the ylang-ylang tree perfumed the air. New life begins, and hope springs eternal.

Church, Corporate Social Responsibility, Faith, Friendship, Love, Work

Giving back, gaining more

August 2, 2014 administrator

August 1, 2014. Every last Wednesday of the month, TeamAsia stops work for an hour to celebrate staff birthdays and company achievements, break bread (well, mostly pizza and cupcakes), welcome new staff (who gamely butt spell their names), bid adieu to those who move on, play games, sing and dance sometimes, and generally have loads of fun together. Called Pop Up Wednesdays, this tradition was started by Bea a year ago when she came back from her studies in Boston to a company grieving the loss of its founder, her dad. Bea’s arrival was a breath of fresh air, full of sunshine and sparkles, and she quickly formed a team from different departments tasked to be as creative as they can be to come up with a fresh theme each month.

Themes vary depending on the times. We’ve had Zen (loved the shoulder and foot massages), Frozen (icy games), Glaze (hot choco and donuts), Blockbusters (challenging games), Soirees (getting to know you better), Filipiniana (tested our native tongue), TAkot 2013 (Halloween spooktivities that had the entire office transformed into the stuff of nightmares), Chinese New Year, and more. Pop Up Wednesdays was a date each month where we tucked away the stress of everyday work life and client deadlines to just talk to each other and reconnect as family. For a sneak peak into our Pop Up Wednesdays, check out this link, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lGBM2H0C4aE.

Today’s Pop Up was different. July is Corporate Social Responsibility Month, and we wanted to give back to our local community. Because of the busy week, we moved Pop Up to a Friday afternoon, and went offsite to Haven for Children along Zapote Road. Haven for Children is a center for male street children aged 7-13 years who are recovering from substance abuse like rugby and marijuana. Some are addicted to alcohol and smoking. We were warned not to take frontal photos as some of them have taken refuge there to escape from fraternities and gangs, and to watch out for our things.

My heart sank as I learned from some of the boys that they had been abandoned by their parents, beaten black and blue by barangay tanods who caught them stealing or sniffing, survived on the streets foraging leftovers from garbage disposals or begging for food. By a twist of fate, this could have been me or my children, I thought.

The initial aloofness was soon dispelled when we began playing our games. Grouped into six teams with ate and kuya TeamAsians as game masters, the boys enacted values like pagiging matulungin (helpfulness), pag-aalaga ng kalikasan (concern for the environment), pagpapakita ng respeto sa kapwa (showing respecting for others), and pagiging madasalin (being prayerful). Each tableau was unique and I was struck that the boys were more inclusive than most adults, showing prayer in different religions: Catholic, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, and in different situations: at home, at church, during calamities and celebrations. It was difficult to judge the groups; I wanted to hug each and every child and congratulate them.

The hare, wall and archer game (big brother version of paper, scissors and stone) had everyone whooping, cheering, and jumping as they competed with each other. The hula hoop relay challenged the children’s physical agility, and boy, were they fast! Tired and spent after the games, TeamAsians and their young wards happily munched on the burgers, fries and soda we brought. The children then wanted to dance and sing for us, impromptu, to show their appreciation. They wanted to go on and on, but it was getting late, and sadly we had to leave. As we walked back to the cars, the kids made “mano,” hugged, and high-fived us. “Balik kayo, ha? Promise?,” a little child asked. I nodded, my heart in my throat. One of the boys ran after our senior graphic designer and handed her a rosary as a gift.

One of the “nanays” (social workers) observed that the children have never been as noisy and happy as this afternoon’s outreach, although there have been several groups that have visited. “Iba kayo,” she said, “talagang masaya.” Truth to tell, Pop Up Wednesdays have always been noisy and happy, but today was so much more. It was fulfilling. We thought we were giving back, but instead, we were the ones who gained, hearts bursting with happiness, in full measure.

The words of Luke 6:38 ring true: “Give, and it will be given to you. A good portion—packed down, firmly shaken, and overflowing—will fall into your lap. The portion you give will determine the portion you receive in return.”

We definitely will be returning.

Faith, Family, God, Love

Roller Coaster Ride

July 29, 2014 administrator 2 Comments

May 4, 2011. It’s been a roller coaster ride with the cornea transplant. The first one that took place on a Friday three weeks ago went perfectly well but the very next day Mike accidentally hit his eye with his arm while sleeping and burst a suture. Mike complained about pain Saturday and Sunday, but the doctor thought it was just the natural healing process and told him to just rest and take medication.

We didn’t know the real situation until his Monday checkup, and the doctor didn’t let him go home. He went straight into surgery to save the cornea, and added another five sutures to the 16 Mike already had. The danger was that infection had set in during the weekend when a part of the eye was open. For the next week it seemed that things were getting better other than Mike’s complaint that he was not seeing things as clearly as he did right after the first operation (which the doctor attributed to the additional five stitches that were bearing more weight than the others) and that there was a constant pain in one part of the eye.

So last Wednesday, when Mike went to the doctor, they noticed that there was a new tear and that suture management had to be done. Mike was scheduled for surgery the next day.The doctor removed the five stitches he had added and re-arranged stitches so that there would be equal bearing on the eye. Well, what was supposed to take 30 minutes took about three hours. Once again, subsequent check-ups indicated that things were OK.

Then the other day while I was at a meeting in Makati, I got a text message from Bea that Mike was again going into the Operating Room. That’s when I completely lost it. Before going to Asian Hospital, I passed by our parish church, went on my knees, wept and implored God for help.

Bea and I prayed on our way to the hospital. The operation took from 7pm to 12:30 am. I didn’t even get to see Mike or talk to the doctor before the surgery. I kept begging the nurses for word as to what was happening. All they could say was that the operation was ongoing, and that Dr. Manolette Roque was the only doctor in attendance.

When the doctor finally emerged, he looked exhausted. I hugged him and thanked him. He said he had to re do all the sutures twice because part of the cornea had torn, part of it had dissolved, the eye chamber had almost collapsed, and was leaking like a cheesecloth. He said he finally got the leaks plugged, had put in a lens bandage, and wanted to see Mike when he woke up.

Both Mike and Dr. Manolette hadn’t eaten or taken a sip of water all those long hours. The surgery was done without general anesthesia, as there was no prep time. At one point, the doctor asked Mike if he believed in God. Mike said he was Christian, and so they both prayed hoping for a miracle. Outside, Bea and I continued praying. I saw Pope John Paul’s beatification on the waiting lounge TV and prayed to him for a miracle.

It took Asian Hospital awhile to get the billing done as we were the only ones left. We arrived home at about 2:30am, and I had to leave for a teaching assignment by 7am. By 1pm, I accompanied Mike to the doctor. We feared the worst.

When he removed the bandage, Manolette was overjoyed because the cornea was still clear, the chamber was deep, and there was no leak. He couldn’t believe his eyes. He had expected the cornea to die because of all the trauma it had suffered. He was so happy he started to cry. He said there was no explanation. I told him there was only one. God had listened to our prayers and performed a miracle!

TeamAsia founder and president, trainer, event organizer, food and art lover. President, Philippine Association of Convention/Exhibition Organizers and Supplier Philippines · teamasia.com